Brooke Candy has been on my interview wishlist for sometime now, and I wouldn’t even consider her my favorite rapper. I wouldn’t even consider her to be the baddest b****. CL of 2NE1 is the baddest. But I do like Brooke Candy’s style. It fits my aesthetic! And yes I know, this kind of makes me a music bad guy, but whatev’s. I’ve been through all the prejudice ideologies of music to defend my taste. But that can be such a pain, and you know what, sometimes I just like bulls*** vibrations traveling through air. But don’t mistake me for no fool. I’m not new to this music s***. I started when I was 7. Yes I was into stuff like the Spice Girls and the Backstreet Boys, but I still copped Portishead’s album around that age too because “All Mine” was brilliant. Ahh! Let me not get off topic or point fingers at who started it first becz then I wouldn’t really be showing growth. Yet, who am I kidding? Folks always playing catch up becz of their nescient ways. I have an appreciation for a number of things regardless of who do and who don’t.
If you’re anything like me, you need privacy in the restroom. That is like my sanctuary inside of the home. No one is allowed in when occupied, and it better be clean. Anyway, this story isn’t about how clean you should keep your bathroom. It’s about when you have to use a toilet that’s not yours. It’s a guys. The guy you aren’t exactly with. The dude who still sees that butt as that ASS. The one who still makes fun of girl farts because of course, ladies don’t have gas. Gas is a myth. And taking a poop is unheard of….well more like the unaddressed.
As crafty ladies I say let’s keep up the charades. If you’re staying overnight, or for a weekend, hell even if you are in a relationship, why let him know what goes on in there?! Here is the only trick I know to help out if you really gotta go poo.
Ahead of time, turn the smallest room into a powder house. Fill it with fem products like perfumes, makeup and flatirons. He won’t suspect a thing. You’ve had too much Chipotle, the beans are really starting to set in, and the time has come for you to ummm…release. Don’t be ashamed. Excuse yourself with some bulls*** like ‘oh I have to freshen up!’. No harm, no further questions. Once you’re in it’s time to plug the irons then turn on the shower. Preferably a really warm, damn near steaming shower. I don’t know why, but heat from the irons and steam from the shower disguise scents and sounds! In the meantime, he’s completely clueless to what’s going on. And once you’re done you can literally keep your word and freshen up. Oh and look! All of your magic is right there in the bathroom to doll yourself up. But before you leave, make sure to spritz that b**** down! And come out looking like a star.
As much as I talk about boobs, I know in my heart of hearts that the ass is really where it’s at. I’m mean come on! No one can deny a glance at something so round and bouncy and perfect. There’s got to be a reason the lower-end gets paid and pleasure. I personally am a fan of my own little big booty becz it’s plump, but I can also appreciate a juicy patooty when I see one. Not to be mistaken with the church butts OR the type that’s one bowl of beans away from being a hot ass mushy mess. Yuck! I’m talking about the one’s that actually put in maintenance and represent for the derrieres across the globe.
After watching the ‘Watermelon Woman’ I took a good look in the mirror at my own body then started blogging my thoughts. Maybe I am ‘lucky that my breast are small and humble’. I’m petite but the little bit of fat I do have goes to my bottom half adding some proportion, Thank God! When I’m in the moment with a guy, it’s not the bee stings he’s reaching for. It’s my ass! And I like it that way. But I wasn’t always like this. It took some time (not a lot) to accept my shape as it is. So now I think it’s kind of sad when girls feel pressured to ‘improve’ to be appealing. This isn’t supposed to turn into some let’s hold hands and build our esteem piece. To be frank, unattractive b******* still do exist. But I do want girls to take away that confidence is key. If you can only afford to love your natural being, treat your body to a intrepid lifestyle. If you gotta rock the Booty Pop, own that shit! If you’re going under the knife, think long and hard about it. It’s not necessary but if you do it, do it for the love of yourself, not the acceptance of others (which hardly makes sense but I get what I’m saying). It’s a cold world out there where sex appeal is said to be everything. You were born in your body so you might as well treat it like treasure. Find your favorite asset(s) and take care of it. That’s all I had to say.
It’s spring but I haven’t felt like relaxing. I’ve just been up applying, applying, applying. Then waiting, waiting, waiting. Sometimes there’s a response. Most times it’s no word back. But in the meantime please do expect more Q&A’s. Those keep me focused and inspired! Oh, and I have literally stepped outside of my comfort zone in hopes of getting to where I want to be. It’s about that time to start making a list. Short-term and long-term, and see where it takes me. xx
By Isis Nicole
I have a serious problem. And it’s about guys. And I want to figure out why this whole thing even started so I can change it. Okay, so here it goes. Why is it that a guy can catch all of my attention when wearing a hat but when he takes it off my feelings change?! It’s like what’s underneath the beautiful halo is always some kind of lame ass haircut or head shape. I’m smitten for the beanies, the fitted’s, and the snappers. Fedora’s…umm not so much. And this is driving me crazy! First finger f*** fantasies thanks to mpc’s, then the necessity of humor, now this! When did I start caring so much about such useless material?! Hats! And even worse. Why is it so difficult to find a beautiful face, a beautiful hat, and a beautiful head? Don’t get me wrong. I do notice height, weight, scent and personality (not at all meant to be in a superficial order!) BUT wearing a good fit can alter everything. I would scratch one of the five dating prerequisites just because of a God dang hat. Yet, basing attraction off of head accessories is getting me nowhere. Take that back. It’s getting me somewhere, just what’s underneath is a bummer. Maybe this is how guys feel when rubbing their fingers thru what they thought was a non weave wearing head. Or maybe how girls feel when the “package” doesn’t nearly compare to its ummm….ego. I’ll tell you who is sexy regardless of headwear *cough cough* Diplo *cough cough*. Ugh, truth is, I’m getting more and more specific with my attractions and I really don’t mean to be such a b$#%!
This S/S 2012 has started off pretty good. I got asked to help with the project ‘Nailgasm’ and in doing so, got sent off to London for a week. This was quite an experience that I’ll never forget, especially having been honored to stay with Sophy Robson and meeting the Nail Porn family. It was my first time on a plane and first time out of the country. Chicago looks beyond beautiful high above the ground. On the ride I kept thinking about being over the ocean. And wishing planes could fly lower so I could possibly see a humpback whale.